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    July 28

    猪的单身朋友们

    不知什么时候开始,猪身边的朋友流行单身。

    猪觉得单身分为三种,一种叫一直单身型;一种叫短期单身型,刚刚失恋啦或者离婚拉,一般这个人群的单身周期不会很长,很快他(她)们就会有一段很新鲜的感情;最后一种叫混充单身型,呵呵,这里就不着重谈了。

    有几个一直单身型的朋友,单身的年代太久了。久到不好意思问年限,短的三五年,长则十年,简直恐怖!你如果想吃白眼就随便问好了,猪不傻的。久到一坐下来就不知不觉扯到感情这件事,聊起曾经相亲过的第N个人的笑话,聊起精彩的拒绝对白,最近就有一段,摘录如下:

    男:你愿意和我一起去XXX地方去吗?

    女:懵懂状,心里活动(和你?去那里,干吗?大家又不熟。)答:怎么说?

    男:你愿意做全职太太吗?

    女:晕状,心里活动(我又没有把简历给他,凭什么规划我的职业),答到:这个职业我不熟哎。

    一场姻缘就这样被生生掐断了。

    其实,一直单身型的朋友们往往很优秀,无论个人形象、才能或者社会职位都是很不错的,但一直单身型的朋友很在乎什么时候结束单身,在乎到给谁结束自己的单身都感到不甘心的程度。猪觉得这是一种病,而且没有办法救的。只有等他们慢慢找了。

    记得猪曾经陪这样一位朋友去相亲,两人见面,朋友用了1秒钟扫描对方就决定不再深谈了,害得猪吹拉谈唱,撑住场面不冷下去,还逗得那个难看的女孩(对不起,是实话)花枝招展的,回去后托话过来说:要是相亲的是猪就好了。吓得猪出一身冷汗,诸位看官都知道猪是有家室的,而且感情甚好,绝对没的说。从此猪再也没有陪朋友去相过亲,就是害怕自己光彩照人,抢了朋友的风头。

    说句实话,根据猪的经验,也实在说不出让这些朋友一定要结婚的理由,所以他们就一直单身着。等着我的理论出台,好照本执行。哈哈

     

     

     

    Comments (2)

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    junhuawrote:
    是吹嘘吗?是真实的故事啊。我觉得要真实的反映情况,这是做猪的起码原则嘛。哈哈
    July 31
    莉 何wrote:
    哈哈,果然这段经典的对白出现在了这里~
    突然发现,你每次都会顺带着的吹嘘一下自己咯~无药可救啊
    连带着看日志的原本纯真的我们,一起被毒害啊~
    July 31

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